Interesting Times


Remember the curse, “I hope you live in interesting times?”  Well it bit me yesterday.  I got a part time gig as a driver for a lawyer.  Not that big a deal, just drive down to an out-of-town hearing and be her “gopher” for the day, then drive back.

But the things you see and hear in court.  This was, at least for now, a municipal case.  I can’t talk about what happened in that case, but I can talk about the other cases I heard in the courtroom!  It was “warrant court” so most of the cases where situations where one citizen had sworn out a warrant against another citizen.  Generally the police were not involved.

So we’re talking peeping toms, noisy neighbors, and generally any complaint you can think of between two neighbors.  Often nasty, very “Jerry Springer.”  I also learned that cities can be jerks, and pull dirty tricks too.  It was impressive to see their dirty tricks backfire, but none-the-less disappointing to see cities use such tactics against honest businesses.

After court, I went to look at the old fraternity house, which is now a massive new apartment complex.  I also drove over to the new house, and one of the young men there gave me a tour.  The brother was exceptionally nice, and the new house is amazing.  I was impressed.

Then a drive home.  Which included taking the lawyer by another client to look over merchandise for a new store.  We went to a warehouse so the lawyer could render and opinion on any legal problems with the new merchandise.  The warehouse was mostly stocked with what polite people call “marital aides.”  Others might call them sex toys.  I decided to call them part of the job, and stood around as the lawyer passed judgement on various products.

It was also difficult.  No rude comments were made, everyone was nice and friendly and very respectful.   I had a million snarky one line comments running through my head, but I’m actually a little ashamed of that.  The people there were all so forthright and honest and respectful that I felt guilty for thinking what I was thinking.

But if YOU are honest with yourself, and were standing by a shelf filled with autographed lifelike reproductions of male adult film star’s money making attributes, you’d probably have a snarky comment or two floating around your head too.  Admit it, even if just to yourself.

Just a job…  Get back in the car and drive some more.  Keep driving.  Talk with a guy about a web job.  Met some other people interested in having me turn some of their writings into iPhone apps.  Nothing I can “take to the bank” but at least something heading toward bringing in some money.

Yea money.  It is an evil and cruel mistress.

3 thoughts on “Interesting Times

  1. “a shelf filled with autographed lifelike reproductions of male adult film star’s money making attributes”

    Oh my! You have quite a talent for words, Mr. Malone, to be able to come up with that mature euphemistic phrase. I curtsy, sir.

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